Wednesday. A dark day, both literally and metaphorically.
I walk towards the car, thankful that it is pouring rain. Thankful that I can shield my face with my giant black umbrella. My mind is as flooded as the puddles that mark my path. Just make it to the car. Keep the umbrella down low and jump in the car where you'll be safe and you can just drive...
I look up for a brief moment when crossing the street and that's when I see her. Shit. Shit! She saw me. The Nun is walking towards me, her pace quickening with every step. She is the last person I want to see at this moment. Her steps are so quick and so light. Happiness and Light. And today, at least, I'm Dark. Oh So Dark.
I can't even pretend that I didn't see her. We had that split second of recognizance. And she's walking ohsofast. She speed walks across the street and before I can think, "Hi, Christine! Leaving work already?" It's just barely 10:30. I mumble a mouthful of excuses - far too many excuses. I'm talking far too much; the sign of a true liar. I am lying to The Nun of all people, but the only thing I can think of is that my makeup is washed away and it obviously has nothing to do with the rain and if I talk enough, then perhaps she won't. I look ahead, my eyes locked on my car, speed walking myself now, just trying to get inside my refuge on wheels and back home.
"Oh, Christine..." The Nun's hand suddenly slices the air in front of my path forcing me to abruptly stop. "Stop! Just look at that..." And in the frozen patch of snow on a random lawn is a sprout of brilliant green. A crocus just beginning its new spring life, pushing against all odds through the rough, icy terrain.
And with that, The Nun glides off, a God Bless You wafting through the clean spring air. She rounds the corner and is gone...
She appeared at the very moment I needed to get outside of my own mind and for this I feel strangely grateful. In a moment plucked from deep darkness, she taught me to look beyond myself, away from my own intense scrutiny and introspection. She taught me in that moment to refocus.
And I am suddenly, for just a very split second that day, truly happy.
