Ask Again, Yes by Mary Beth Keane

While I definitely use books as an escape from the everyday, one of my favourite categories of fiction is realistic multi-generational family dramas, which is why I loved Ask Again, Yes.

Early on, we're introduced to Francis Gleeson and Brian Stanhope, two rookie police officers who end up neighbours. Francis' wife, Lena, is extremely outgoing and wants nothing more than to meet people and open up her home and expand her social life, but she soon discovers after a few eager attempts that Brian's wife, Anne, wasn't at all receptive to her friendship.

Both couples go on to have families of their own and, as kids tend to do, two of the neighbours' kids, Kate Gleeson and Peter Stanhope, form an early bond and become best friends. They both have vastly different childhoods. They grow up side by side, but their home lives couldn't be more different. Through each of their families' ups and downs, Kate and Peter lean on and fully trust each other. They become inseparable.

Suddenly, one night when Kate and Peter are in the eighth grade, a shocking event takes place that will forever affect both families. This single event blows the novel apart and the course of its trajectory becomes completely unpredictable.

Mary Beth Keane's talent as a writer is her ability to capture the subtleties of daily life that gradually change people as time passes. These small subtleties create small ripples over the days, months and years that cause the characters and the reader to form new perspectives of each other, just as they do in real life. If you think you know the characters well at the beginning of the book, prepare to keep an open mind. Relationships morph and change in ways you could never predict. Characters reflect deeply on their current circumstances as well as their home lives and how they were raised. The choices they make are influenced by their families, by others' expectations of them and by their own introspection about how they got to where they ended up and where they want to be in life.

The unpredictability, the character development and the plotlines of this novel moved me equally across this sweeping novel. I usually rush through novels, but I took the time to savour this one and really let everything sink in, which made for an extremely satisfying read. There was a lot going on. It was a good reminder that it can be a good thing to slow down once in a while and let the plot settle in a little before moving onto the next great book.

Judge the cover: 4/5

Girls Burn Brighter by Shobha Rao

Have you ever lost a friend? It can hurt as much as losing a lover. This is the case with Poornima and Savitha, two girls from an extremely poor Indian village. Their lives are filled with obstacles: it's difficult for them to find enough food to eat, they never have enough money, they both have challenges with their families and everyday living is mainly about survival. So when their lives intersect and they become friends via Poornima's father's weaving business, their friendship becomes the only bright beacon in an otherwise dark world.

Poornima has a bit of a rebellious streak and all she wants is to be near Savitha. After thwarting a few marriage proposals that threatened to move her away from her village (where Savitha would have to remain, as she has other sisters whose dowries needed to be saved up for first) and further upsetting her already fragile relationship with her father, Poornima is finally set to be wed via an arranged marriage to a man she doesn't meet until her wedding day. Savitha, excited that her dearest friend will be in a relationship where she'll be able to remain near the village, decides to dedicate any extra hours she has to making Poornima a special wedding sari. After finally having something positive to latch onto as things finally begin to work out for them, both girls are feeling fairly optimistic about the future. But just before the wedding is to take place, a darkly tragic event takes place, forcing Savitha to flee. Poornima is heartbroken. As she slept, her life was completely turned upside down. She went to sleep with her friend there and woke up to an emptiness unlike anything she'd felt before.

Poornima has no choice but to go ahead with the marriage, but her thoughts are overtaken by the loss of her friend. Meanwhile, Savitha, in absolute poverty yet feeling she had no choice but to escape, disappears out into the world. The next few years are spent following the two girls as they continue their daily existence, all the while never forgetting each other. Poornima relies on her memories; Savitha carries around the half-finished sari. Both girls experience insurmountable grief for the loss of the other. But finding their way back to each other seems utterly impossible when stacked up against all of the things that already exist to challenge them: no money, no means, no idea of each others' whereabouts, language barriers, dead-ends...not to mention all of the new cruel obstacles they don't even know about.

How do you find someone who could literally be anywhere out there in the world? How do you go on when you've lost the one and only person who means the world to you? Can you overcome your vulnerabilities when you're poor, uneducated and seen as less-than in the world? This book is a gripping examination of all of these things. It's a book about trying to overcome the impossible when you have no one but yourself and the love for another person to keep you moving forward.

Judge the cover: 5/5 

Wild by Cheryl Strayed

Sometimes when an of-the-moment book's buzz has died down, I don't bother reading it. In this instance, I was really glad I picked up Wild, even though its heyday was at least a good five years ago.

Reasons I didn't think I'd enjoy it:

- I'm not a nature person.
- I'm not into hiking. Or camping.
- I didn't think I'd be into the story of a woman hiking in nature for months on end.

Reasons I was wrong:

- I'm still not a nature girl, but I really enjoyed following along with Cheryl as she dodged rattlesnakes, bears and mountain lions and her vivid descriptions of the wide variety of landscapes she traversed.
- I'm still not into hiking or camping, but I had such a deep appreciation for her just picking up and going for it. It wasn't as though she was just setting out for a day trip - she was a badass woman who traveled on her own for three months. This very fact made her story stand out.
- Because of the drama both on the trail (the wild animals, the crazy unpredictable weather, the lack of food and potable water) and her own personal demons (drugs, deep relationship issues, coming to terms with her family's dynamics following the death of her mother) there was always something exciting propelling the narrative forward.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book, probably more so because I wasn't expecting to. I love personal challenges, so the fact that she went into this extraordinary challenge without really doing adequate research, without feeling the need to be an expert on everything before she set out, and because of the endless trials she endured on the trail yet managing to push through them when most would have given up, I really found this to be a wild adventure of a book.

Judge the cover: 2/5

Mistakes to Run With by Yasuko Thanh

Yasuko Thanh's story demonstrates in the most heartbreaking way what can happen to a life, to a soul when it isn't shown protective love or care. From a young age, and particularly after the birth of her brother, Yasuko was ignored. Her mother wanted nothing to do with her but doted on her brother, and her father, suddenly afflicted with a myriad of allergies and sensitivities, retreated to his bed.

At fifteen, she found the streets. She sold her body for money, for shelter, for food. She found couches to sleep on or sometimes the cold, hard streets themselves. She found friends, but the hazards of living life in the fast lane meant that these friends had issues of their own: many overdosed, moved onto the next city or died of AIDS. Yasuko herself was running away from a family who didn't care about her and towards people she thought did. She found solace in men who offered her what she thought was love. She was too young and inexperienced in life to know that a pimp is only out for himself. That a crackhead puts their addiction to crack above everything else, no matter what reassuring platitudes come out of his mouth. That a schizophrenic boyfriend whose increasingly frantic delusions weren't something she could help with on her own.

So she moved to different cities, even a different continent, to try to find peace within her broken soul, but eventually learned that it's impossible to outrun matters of the heart. Everything catches up eventually. The one thing that was truly a positive outlet for Yasuko was her writing. After giving up prostitution for good, she felt a compulsion to write. One habit replaced another. Unfortunately, as her writing career started gaining traction, her relationships continued imploding and she felt her body and mind attacking her already fragile sense of self.

Yasuko has a way with words that draws you into her story. I can only imagine the assumptions people on the gritty East Vancouver streets would have made of her on first glance - the six-inch stilettos, the dirty clothes, the marks on her body - never knowing that a beautiful garden of a mind resided under her tattered facade. It takes a certain amount of bravery to tell a story that doesn't fall within society's mainstream expectations, but it takes an equal amount of bravery to reveal a heart's deepest pain. Yasuko did both and after reading her story, I'm hopeful that she finds peace and happiness to replace all of the hurt she has endured so far.

Judge the cover: 4/5

Body Leaping Backward: Memoir of a Delinquent Childhood

Maureen Stanton was just fifteen when she got into angel dust. She was the middle child in a huge family that lived in the small town of Walpole, the most interesting fact of which seemed to be that it was home to Walpole Prison. Maureen's mother would warn her kids when they were growing up that if they didn't behave, they'd end up in behind bars there. 

The story of Maureen's drug dabbling didn't really get going until about fifty pages in. Up until then, she told stories of her fairly typical seventies childhood: riding bikes, swimming, hanging out with the neighbourhood kids. She always had a rebellious streak and spoke her mind, so it wasn't too surprising when she started experimenting with drugs in her early teenage years. Her parents split up and this, combined with the large number of siblings she had, allowed her to fly a bit under the radar. 

There were interesting elements, one being her straight-laced mother who ended up shoplifting, and stories of Maureen's childhood interspersed with infamous prisoners' stories from the Walpole Prison, like the Boston Strangler. Unfortunately, these stories dangled and then ultimately petered out. I found the same to be true of Maureen's own story. Yes, she had some interesting tales to tell, but they just felt as though they happened without much consequence. She never had an addiction so bad that she needed to go to rehab or struggled too hard to quit her drug habit. She never got in legal trouble. She barely even got in trouble from her parents. It all just basically took care of itself when she felt too introspective the final time she took angel dust and became depressed. I feel as though when publishing a memoir - particularly an addition-type memoir of which there are plenty out there - it helps to have an exceptional story to share. This one just fell a bit flat for me.

I generally read books fairly quickly but was away for a few days just after I'd started this book and didn't have as much time to read as I normally do. I just didn't feel a pull towards this one. My curiosity wasn't piqued as much as it usually is with this particular genre and I wasn't dying to know what happened next. That said, the quality of the writing was good and, more importantly, I'm extremely happy for the author's sake that she didn't have a harder time coming off the heavier drugs she took and didn't become another tragic statistic.

Judge the cover: 3/5

Three Women by Lisa Taddeo

If you were to summarize this book in one sentence, you might say this is a book about the sex lives of three women. But this book isn't nearly as surface-level as that. It's much more complex and, in many ways, it's not even about sex. The sex is secondary to the varied reasons why these women have such strong feelings towards their partners and how they are rarely fulfilled in their hearts and souls. Their extreme reliance on the partners in their lives becomes the prevailing focus. The affairs they participate in, the lack of resolution when it comes to their hearts, the sheer unhappiness that pervades is tangible. These women's stories are not salacious, they are actually sad and quite heartbreaking.

While there are certainly common aspects to each of the women's stories, the situations that propelled each of them into the present are unique. The outcomes that were formed from childhood circumstances, to the families they were born into, to situations that they engaged in, either willingly or by force, each shaped who these women are today.

Maggie was just seventeen when one of her high school teachers took advantage of and started a sexual relationship with her. Lina's story begins with her as an unhappily married woman whose only wish is for her husband to kiss her, which he refuses to do. Sloane is a wealthy restaurant owner whose husband gets off when she hooks up with other people, either with him present or not.

Each woman lives inside the questions their circumstances present them with. They have eating disorders and terrible self-esteem. They look to men to provide reassurance as they scratch at love. While the women fall hard and fast and seem to genuinely fall in love with the men they're pursuing, the men are using the women purely for their own selfish purposes and really have no intention of disrupting their own lives in order to give the women the stability and true love that they yearn for. Everything that happens within their relationships is on the men's terms. The women are always pining or trying to wish things into existence or wanting to get in touch with the men, but they are always limited by the men as to the specific rules they must follow. The women are always waiting, always ready to do anything for the men on a moment's notice, yet the men never reverse their strategies or reciprocate in the same way. To them, the women are convenient and subservient. Probably one of the most agonizing observations is that at most times, these women aren't blindsided by the men setting the ground rules - rather, they're fully aware that the men are pulling the strings and they are merely the puppets, yet their depth of yearning and wanting to feel loved is so strong they acquiesce to it all. While they all encounter doubts at some points along their journeys, the pull of a possible one-in-a-million fairy tale ending still feels frustratingly just out of their grasp, yet they can't bring themselves to stop reaching.

Each of these three women looks outside of herself for love and acceptance. They're all participating in affairs of some kind - either cheating on their own spouse or hooking up with others who are married. In each instance, the affairs cause the women interminable stress. They take up an abundance of mental energy and the constant gender imbalance further tears the women down.

Out of the three women, I felt the most engaged with Maggie's story. I think it's because she was so young and, because of that, things seems to happen to her rather than her being able to truly have an adult decision-making capability based on experience and knowledge. Her story wasn't so much about desire as it was about the power of a well-loved man over an innocent "troubled" girl and how that power play worked in everyone's favour but her own. Her chapters follow her from her high school days right through to the court case between her and her former teacher.

Style-wise, the women's chapters are written in an alternating format. I think I would have preferred to have each woman's story told as a whole in three complete parts, as I sometimes found it jarring or confusing to switch back and forth to different storylines and people. The revelations are so intense and gripping that it would have been easier to digest one person's story at a time, but that's just my personal preference.

I try not to read reviews before reading books myself, but in this instance, I read a few just to get a better idea of what the book might be about. I saw reviewers state that there isn't enough diversity, which really can't be disputed, but though their skin colour might be the same, I found the women's backgrounds, their ages and married status, as well as their stages in life quite diverse. I also saw quite a few statements along the lines of the author spent years with these women and it doesn't resolve enough or that there's no real analysis. Maybe I didn't dig deep enough, but for me, a lack of analysis wasn't such a missing component. These are the women's stories and I don't feel as though they require a conclusion. It's a book about how women in particular are perceived and judged harshly from the outside world - they are married, they have children, a home, a big car, nice hair - whatever the random markers are of supposed success - so they should be happy and stop complaining, stop whining. Be quiet. Be small. But outer appearances really don't tell any kind of accurate story. These three women found the courage speak up and to shine a bright white spotlight directly onto their hearts. They were some of a small number who were brave enough to share their histories, their desires, their traumas and shame without filters. They each let their innermost stories out into the world and I hope in doing so, they finally feel at least a little taste of freedom.

Judge the cover: 2/5

Supper Club by Lara Williams

Roberta is a lonely girl. She perches on the outer fringes of friendships and relationships and never quite knows how to fit in. That is, until she meets the enigmatic Stevie, a renegade artistic girl who takes Roberta under her wing and teaches her to try to be a little more fearless and to insert herself more confidently into her life. Together, they form the idea for Supper Club - evenings whereby a group of pre-interviewed girls who want to take up more space in the world and make themselves bigger eat large meals themed in different settings, rendering the act of eating into an artistic experiment.

The Supper Club evenings are carefully planned and start out as pretty elaborate affairs. The girls forage for food, cook elaborate feasts, indulge in various stimulants and then gorge on food and dance around, expressing themselves and forming bonds through food and consumption.

It's all a little outlandish, in my opinion, and I can't tell if the uniqueness of this book is brilliantly original or a little much. Lara Williams' writing reminded me a bit of Miranda July and Ottessa Moshfegh in its slightly offbeat theme. Some parts of the books come off as a little disjointed for me, in particular when it comes to Roberta's relationships. There is one with an older professor, which has some questionable moments, as well as an intimate relationship with a former roommate who, while he loves her, doesn't seem to fully embrace her completely and likewise, she to him. They appear to be constantly trying to find their footing with each other. The only time Roberta seems to exert herself fully is at Supper Club meetings, which her boyfriend really hates, as he thinks Stevie is a bad influence. He seems to feel excluded and ignored and though Roberta and her boyfriend seem to share a fairly comfortable existence, it's not always clear why they're together, as they never seem to be fully supportive of each other. Roberta hasn't had many opportunities for solid relationships throughout her life, so perhaps it makes sense that her relationship boundaries don't always feel as clear or seem to make as much sense as they might otherwise.

Another part of the story that didn't sit clearly with me is the relationship between Roberta's estranged father and her. She receives friendly letters from him on a fairly regular basis, and he's open to meeting up with her if ever she feels that's something she wants to do, but ultimately, I don't really see where this storyline was going. She doesn't seem to mind receiving the letters, so I can only presume that this character is included to show yet another area in which she doesn't have many stable males in her life, which perpetuates her apparent tightrope walk when it comes to how she relates to others and their feelings.

Ultimately, this is a novel that is centered around feminism, the power of collective female actions, and about what it means to reject traditional male ideals by consciously not trying to make oneself tiny and quiet and perfect in order to fit in. I'm not sure it necessarily ticked all of the boxes, but it was certainly a unique book. 

In the end, I find this book a hard one to rate. I didn't feel entirely engaged with Roberta's story or many of the characters, yet I was always interested to pick up the book and keep reading to find out how the various storylines would play out, so ultimately I'm giving it a middle-of-the-road 3.5/5 stars.

Judge the cover: 4/5